Lately Miranda has been into cooking. But only at the real stove, of course. What do I think she is, a 2 year old who should use a play kitchen set?! Insulting. She likes to be Ratatoullie and I am Linguini. She says, "Can I help you coook?" like that with a very long O. I think she thinks it is a British accent...coook almost rhymes with puke. She adds pretend ingredients, wafts the scent to her nose to see what is still lacking, helps me stir, and eyes the burners, longing to sneak a forbidden touch.
She does quite well, actually, and for a moment I honestly contemplated teaching her to make a few simple recipes. Then she actually did touch a burner which, phew, was only hot enough to scare her a little. Lesson learned. Once again, I can take no parenting credit for teaching her life skills.
We made homemade macaroni and cheese one day. A first for me, and it showed. Luckily she never had macaroni and cheese made by a true talent, say Kraft for example, so she didn't realize mine stunk. Fernando realized it, sadly. His distaste was very polite. Although at times like that I would actually appreciate him spewing pieces of soggy macaroni into the far reaches of the kitchen and storming into the basement so at least the moment would have some cinematic drama to it. As it was the two of us choked down what was not only not good but not good for us. Stop the cruelty. The kids actually both ate it. So, likely, I'll make it again. I think I might actually be going insane because I'm laughing at this while I'm typing.
Last night my mom gave Miranda some biscuit dough from one of those pop-n-serve cans, and she rolled it and rolled it for more than a half-hour and made us some gooseberry pie. Of course, being Sneezy I had a hard time enjoying it between the sniffles. The only person to sample the finery besides Snow White herself was Dopey. Clearly, the name fit in this case.
Since I have no picture of Chef Miranda, I substituted this picture borrowed from the files of Katie Belnap of an Asian girl. If you blur your eyes it looks a bit like Miranda.
5 comments:
wow i was sure it was miranda! so funny, i giggled all the way through. i often wish for the cinematic drama as well. ryan is very polite. i love your tales. keep them coming. and i want to read your book or even a part of it so get going on that. :)
I bet if you asked Fernando, he would be happy to humor you in a little drama at the dinner table. I can just see him....throwing his napkin to the floor, picking up his plate, showing you the contents with a smirk and then slamming the plate back on the table as the room shakes and the children shudder. Oooo, this is sounding good! Maybe I'll have to try this when Mike makes his mustard-glazed salmon later this week.
Shar---you make me smile! Thanks for posting. Love ya!
I'm glad you clarified about the picture..........I was going to ask when she got glasses. I love reading your blog!
Hey Shar, this is Josh. I don't have a really cool blogger super secrect decoder ring log on thing so I have to leave this now non anonymous message. I really liked the photo of the little chef girl, I didn't think it looked like your girl but it has been a while. As always your writing makes me literally laugh out loud, and draw the "is that guy crazy" stares from those sitting within earshot.
I am dying!! Oh, how I am laughing. That is so cute and so funny--particularly the picture of an Asian girl in the place of Miranda. You are the best!! How I miss laughing with you.
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